Silent Night, Deadly Night Part 2 (1987)

SILENT NIGHT, DEADLY NIGHT PART 2 (1987) *
One might think that the sequel to one of the most controversial movies ever made would not have to rely upon nearly 40 minutes of flashing back to the original like it was a forgotten movie from long ago.

It’s then quite possible the folks responsible for Silent Night, Deadly Night Part 2 thought they didn’t have much of a movie in the first place and they wanted to see if they could ride in on the coattails of the original controversy.

There’s so much of Silent Night, Deadly Night in Part 2 that we could skip the original and just watch Part 2 instead. In fact, that would be my advice to anybody out there curious about watching a Silent Night, Deadly Night movie for the first time, because it’s better to get two bad movies for the price of one.

Take it from someone who obviously went about it all the wrong way and picked the original movie first. Naughty, very naughty, and I was indeed punished!

I postponed watching Silent Night, Deadly Night Part 2 for so long because I heard it through the grapevine that it flashed back heavily on the original, a movie that I detest like almost no other and rate at zero stars. I consider Silent Night, Deadly Night to be one of the worst movies ever made, let alone one of the worst horror movies. It has a steady succession of scuzzy, sleazy, sordid scenes acted out in the most overacted way imaginable. The actors who play Grandpa, Mother Superior, the toy store owner, in particular, they’re all guilty of crimes against cinema for their overacting. Even the kid mullets are overacting. I did appreciate shots of the mountains in the background, however, and it was interesting to see what toys were on the shelves around 1984. Other than that, though, Silent Night, Deadly Night was one great big lump of coal.

Any movie flashing back so heavily on one of the worst movies ever made would seem to have an uphill struggle. Yes, that’s certainly true for Silent Night, Deadly Night Part 2, because how much I despise the original came back almost instantly.

Part 2 centers around Ricky Caldwell (Eric Freeman), who inherits the mantle of serial killer from his older brother Billy Chapman. Ricky’s responsible for the flashbacks to the first movie, as he tells his life story in a nuthouse to court-appointed therapist Henry Bloom. We flash back on events when Ricky was just a baby and several events where he was not even present, but sure why not and 1987 seems to be the year of the flashback with Part 2 outdoing even Jaws: The Revenge.

Part 2 has developed a cult following over the years, of course, centered around Freeman’s performance as Ricky. Yes, he’s responsible for the meme GARBAGE DAY! At one point, I thought I would give Part 2 two stars just because I was enjoying Freeman’s overacting so much; he’s an overacting force of nature, topping Will Hare as Grandpa, Lilyan Chauvin as Mother Superior, Britt Leach as Mr. Sims and everyone else from the first movie combined. Freeman’s exaggerated line readings and expressive eyebrows start out hysterical before they finally wear out their welcome down the backstretch of a bloodbath.

Elizabeth Kaitan briefly provides a bright and sunny presence as Ricky’s potential romantic interest Jennifer before she becomes cannon fodder.

Subtlety is definitely not the strong point of the first two Silent Night, Deadly Night movies. Take for instance the Mother Superior character in Part 2. We know she’s evil incarnate, right, because we can remember her despicable character from the first movie even without all the flashbacks. Mother Superior had a stroke in the interim and she’s retired and living alone when Billy, er, Ricky catches up with her for one final showdown between more evil and less evil. Naturally, she has a scarred face and lives at an address 666. Ho, ho, ho!

I realize that Part 2 was made in a hurry with a shoestring budget well under $1 million, but nonetheless both Silent Night, Deadly Night and Silent Night, Deadly Night Part 2 are garbage movies.

The Slumber Party Massacre (1982)

THE SLUMBER PARTY MASSACRE (1982) ***
Coming across the beloved cult film that was once not so beloved just might be the biggest hazard of movie spectatorship these days.

You better not ride on the general train of thought from the film’s original release or you just might get bludgeoned in the comments section by devotees of the cinematic item under discussion.

You have no taste! You’re an idiot! You just don’t get it! You’re too stupid to understand the undeniable genius! Blah blah blah!

I am thinking first and foremost about films like Halloween III, Howard the Duck, Sleepaway Camp, and Silent Night, Deadly Night.

Maybe you are reading my confession why I had not watched The Slumber Party Massacre until very recently.

I finally caught up with it on Halloween night 2022, I liked it well enough, and I can definitely understand why it’s held in such high esteem in some quarters though I certainly don’t like it as much as others so enthusiastically do.

The Slumber Party Massacre took a while to get started, packed with so many false alarms and jump scares that I began losing patience early on and it was not until the 45- or 50-minute mark that I became enveloped in suspense. The final 25-30 minutes are especially well-made and filled with plenty of impacting moments, so much so that I almost bumped The Slumber Party Massacre up to three-and-a-half stars even after the mixed reaction to the first two-thirds of the film.

All slasher films, whether it be the good, the bad or the ugly, have their gimmicks, be it their setting or their killer in everything from the favorite weapon of choice down to style.

The Slumber Party Massacre sold a good amount on the fact that it has a female director (Amy Holden Jones) and a feminist screenwriter (Rita Mae Brown), something not common for the horror genre overall and specifically the subgenre of the slasher.

Jones shows definite talent in her directorial debut, and it’s no surprise she later directed Love Letters, Maid to Order, and The Rich Man’s Wife and received screenwriting credits on Love Letters, Maid to Order, Mystic Pizza, Beethoven, Indecent Proposal, The Getaway (1994), and The Relic. She also married acclaimed cinematographer Michael Chapman (Taxi Driver, Raging Bull, The Fugitive) in 1980 and stayed his wife until his death in September 2020.

Brown intended The Slumber Party Massacre to be a satire of the slasher genre, but Jones filmed it as straight horror.

However, satirical traces remain throughout The Slumber Party Massacre.Virtually all the male characters are super horny creeps and more than one female character survives all the murder and mayhem, for example.

Never mind that escaped serial killer Russ Thorn (Michael Villella) walks around in plain sight without a mask from the first scene on. He’s also one of a select few slasher film killers with quotes on the Internet Movie Database. Eat your heart out, Jason and Michael!

Also, never mind Thorn’s weapon of choice that could possibly be some kind of metaphor. Yes, it’s a power drill and I’m not sure of the symbology there! I also don’t believe there’s any greater meaning in the ways he meets his inevitable demise at the end of the movie.

The local radio station announces Thorn’s escape more than once, yet nobody seems to notice let alone care until it’s (almost) too late. I seem to remember one of the characters shutting off her car radio in the middle of one of the announcements.

Nearly all the characters are too preoccupied with their pursuits of pleasure at this very moment in time, just like the characters in any Friday the 13th film, to be concerned about some homicidal maniac on a rampage.

These satirical traces make The Slumber Party Massacre a good deal more interesting than, let’s say, Madman and The Prowler.

It works as both a satire and a straight horror film nearly 15 years before Scream came out.

In fact, not that I want to shout about it or anything, The Slumber Party Massacre works better than Scream.

Silent Night, Deadly Night (1984)

SILENT NIGHT, DEADLY NIGHT (1984) No stars
It should be stated right away that I found Silent Night, Deadly Night, the legendary killer Santa Claus picture, to be a shocking experience, though not anywhere near the same reason it created a firestorm of controversy in 1984 and 1985.

Silent Night, Deadly Night is a shockingly bad motion picture, so poorly acted, written, directed, and executed that it becomes laughable without being funny.

If you Google why is Silent Night, Deadly Night controversial, you’ll receive Most protests were generated by the feeling that the depiction of a killer in a Santa Claus suit would traumatize children and undermine their traditional trust in Santa Claus.

Poppycock!

Silent Night, Deadly Night is one of the worst horror movies ever made, but it didn’t traumatize this 44-year-old man or undermine his traditional trust in motion pictures, even low-budget exploitation films.

It must be said that Little Billy, definitely not the same one in the Who song, faces enough childhood trauma in the opening minutes of Silent Night, Deadly Night for a lifetime of bad movies. It should be played at dentist offices everywhere, and not only around Christmas.

He’s told by his otherwise catatonic Grandpa that Santa punishes all those who are naughty, he watches his parents get slaughtered by a killer dressed as Santa, he’s orphaned and introduced to the hateful Mother Superior, and he’s given a lethal mullet.

Little Billy was the fattest kid in his class / Always the last in line / All the other little kids would laugh at him / Said he’d die before his time / Ha ha ha ha / Ha ha ha ha / Little Billy didn’t mind / Most of the kids smoked cigarettes / Just to prove that they were cool / The teacher didn’t know about the children’s games / And Billy always followed the rules / Ha ha ha ha / Ha ha ha ha / Little Billy didn’t mind / Billy was big on the outside / But there’s an even bigger inside / Ten million cigarettes burning every day / And Billy’s doing fine.

The Billy in Silent Night, Deadly Night finally snaps from all that overacting. I mean, seriously, they start in with that shit from the first scene and never let up. Grandpa, Mother Superior, Billy’s boss at the toy store, on down the line, they all played it for the back row.

Now Billy and his classmates are middle-aged / With children of their own / Their smoking games are reality now / And cancer’s seed is sown / Ha ha ha ha / Ha ha ha ha / Little Billy didn’t mind / Most of them smoke maybe 40 a day / A habit Billy doesn’t share / One by one they’re passing away / Leaving orphans to Billy’s care / Ha ha ha ha / Ha ha ha ha / Ha ha ha ha / Little Billy doesn’t mind / Ha ha ha ha / Ha ha ha ha / Little Billy’s doing fine.

Little Billy could have punched out Mike Tyson. When he punches out Santa at the orphanage, you’d think maybe somebody could have introduced Little Billy to Cus D’Amato. Granted, it’s a long, long, long way from Utah to New York and a more uplifting boxing picture would not generate all that controversy and curiosity like a killer dressed up like Santa Claus.

Did you ever see the faces of children? They get so excited / Waking up on Christmas morning hours before the winter sun has ignited / They believe in dreams and all they mean, including heaven’s generosity / Peeping round the door to see what parcels are for free in curiosity.

We patiently wait for Billy to snap throughout Silent Night, Deadly Night, because isn’t that why we’re watching this tripe in the first place?

When he finally does snap and starts the slaughter, it’s every bit as bad and maybe even worse than what came before, believe it or not. This movie does not stop in the pursuit of just plain awful scenes.

Surrounding by his friends he sits / So silently and unaware of everything / Playing Poxy Pinball / Picks his nose and smiles and pokes his tongue at everything / I believe in love but how can men / Who’ve never seen light be enlightened? / Only if he’s cured will his spirits future level ever heighten.

Silent Night, Deadly Night lays it on thick with gratuitous nudity and sexual assault. It’s a very, very, very naughty movie!

Tara Buckman plays Billy’s mother and you might remember her or at least her cleavage from The Cannonball Run, where her and her race partner Adrienne Barbeau brandish their copious amounts of cleavage whenever they’re stopped by law enforcement. She’s not particularly convincing in her role as mother and her bad acting, as well as her sexual assault / death scene, set an early tone for Silent Night, Deadly Night.

Robert Brian Wilson made his motion picture debut as 18-year-old Billy and it easily could have been his only performance because he’s not very good in Silent Night, Deadly Night. Needless to say, for an IMDb biography that starts handsome and muscular actor, Wilson moved on to appearing in a number of soap operas and TV shows.

All of the actors are on the level of a bad soap opera, and the project feels like Amateur Night all the way.

The director Charles E. Sellier Jr. (1943-2011) produced The Life and Times of Grizzly Adams, In Search of Noah’s Ark, The Lincoln Conspiracy, Beyond and Back, The Bermuda Triangle, In Search of Historic Jesus, Hangar 18, Earthbound, The Boogens, and The President Must Die before Silent Night, Deadly Night.

Sellier Jr.’s mini-bio on IMDb starts something like this: Sellier skillfully pioneered market testing and ‘four-walling’ – renting a theater to show his films, thereby enabling him to keep all the profits for himself – garnered him the distinction of having more pictures in the top 50 independent grossers than any other independent producer in the 1970s.

In other words, he was a skilled con artist.

Silent Night, Deadly Night is a big con, and the people responsible for it all knew exactly what they were doing when they marketed the picture with TV spots like the one that intones The most talked-about film of the decade … the movie that shocked America, outraged Hollywood, and frightened the government … the movie that they tried to ban … you’ve read about it, heard about it, and now you can see it in all its terrifying aura.

Their first TV spot played on the killer Santa angle — Santa with an ax, Santa with a gun — and capped it with the tagline You’ve made it through Halloween, now try and survive Christmas! Also, he knows when you’ve been naughty!

Were Silent Night, Deadly Night not so bloody inept it could be a terrifying experience.

Rather, it’s just terrible, and I am thankful for a running time under 90 minutes because any longer I might not have survived Christmas.