Tag: Mad Monkey Kung Fu

The Last Dragon (1985)

THE LAST DRAGON

THE LAST DRAGON (1985) Three stars

Gene Siskel included THE LAST DRAGON among his “Guilty Pleasures” in a 1987 “Siskel & Ebert” show and he gave it one of his funniest reviews, highlighted by “I’m a sucker for glowing fingers. Roger, I see glowing fingers in a movie, I tend to like the movie. … Just one finger (in E.T.), that’s how much I like it. In this one, you get 20. Two men, Roger, 20. Can you imagine the ads? ‘20 times the entertainment value of E.T.’” Siskel gave it three-and-a-half stars in his 1985 print review.

Roger Ebert gave it a mixed negative review and two-and-a-half stars, “THE LAST DRAGON turns into a funny, high-energy combination of karate, romance, rock music and sensational special effects. It’s so entertaining that I could almost recommend it … if it weren’t for an idiotic subplot about a gangster and his girlfriend, a diversion that brings the movie to a dead halt every eight or nine minutes. … They’ve been borrowed from a hundred other movies, they say things that have been said a hundred other times, and they walk around draining the movie of its vitality. They’re tired old cliches getting in the way of the natural energy of Taimak, Vanity and the Shogun character.”

I find myself occupying the middle ground between Siskel and Ebert. They both agreed on the strengths and the weaknesses of THE LAST DRAGON, but Siskel found the strengths to be stronger and Ebert the weaknesses to be weaker. LAST DRAGON co-stars Taimak, Vanity, and Julius J. Carry III are the strengths and Chris Murney as comic gangster Eddie Arkadian and Faith Prince as his aspiring singer girlfriend Angela Viracco are the weaknesses.

Taimak (full name Taimak Guarriello) stars as Leroy Green, who’s inspired by the works of Bruce Lee to such a degree that he’s called “Bruce Leroy.” He’s in pursuit of “The Glow,” referenced memorably by Siskel — see, only a true martial arts master can exhibit “The Glow” over his entire body and that’s Leroy’s No. 1 goal. Scenes like “Don’t think, feel! It’s like a finger pointing away to the moon. Do not concentrate on the finger or you will miss all of the heavenly glory” from ENTER THE DRAGON undoubtedly warmed the heart of Mr. Leroy … and possibly Motown mogul Berry Gordy, whose Motown Productions sponsored THE LAST DRAGON.

He’s opposed by Sho’nuff (Carry III), a.k.a. “The Shogun of Harlem,” who sees Leroy in his way for ultimate martial arts mastery. Sho’nuff interrupts a showing of the sacred text ENTER THE DRAGON in an urban theater and he throws down the gauntlet, “Well well, well. If it ain’t the serious, elusive Leroy Green. I’ve been waiting a long time for this, Leroy. I am sick of hearing these bullshit Superman stories about the — Wassah! — legendary Bruce Leroy catching bullets with his teeth. Catches bullets with his teeth? Nigga please.” Leroy counters with two platitudes that he might have gleaned from the “Kung Fu” TV show, then Sho’nuff throws it down again, “See, now it is mumbo jumbo like that, and skinny little lizards like you thinkin’ they the last dragon that gives kung fu a bad name. Get up, Leroy, I got somethin’ real fo’ yo’ ass in these hands.” Carry III (1952-2008) undoubtedly prepared for his role as Sho’nuff by playing in both DISCO GODFATHER, his debut feature, and THE FISH THAT SAVED PITTSBURGH.

All roads lead to a final showdown between Leroy and Sho’nuff when, sure enough, they both have “The Glow.” Leroy, though, finally exhibits true martial arts mastery.

Bruce Leroy also becomes the protector of television personality Laura Charles (Vanity) against them comic gangsters. She tells Leroy, “I thought that maybe it would be a great idea if I got myself a bodyguard. You know, like someone to guard my body? What girl could do worse than to have her own real life kung fu master?”

THE LAST DRAGON is a lot of fun, especially for viewers who are fans of martial arts spectaculars, particularly Bruce Lee. During the 1985 episode they reviewed THE LAST DRAGON, Siskel and Ebert lamented the lack of quality martial arts entertainment in a special “X-ray segment.” They singled out three “better” martial arts films that predated THE LAST DRAGON: ENTER THE DRAGON, THE OCTAGON starring Chuck Norris, and THE KARATE KID, the surprise blockbuster from 1984. I felt bad for Siskel and Ebert, because it seemed like they missed a great many great martial arts films like DRUNKEN MASTER and THE 36TH CHAMBER OF SHAOLIN, for example, and instead they made several “Dogs of the Week” (their picks for worst movie each episode until September ‘82) from seeing obviously inferior martial arts imports with lousy prints and horrific dubbing. It would be difficult for anybody not to form a negative opinion about martial arts films from seeing only the mass-produced bargain-basement rip-offs that almost immediately came in the wake of Bruce Lee’s death in 1973.

Thankfully, through ventures like the Dragon Dynasty, we can see classics like THE 36TH CHAMBER, KING BOXER (a.k.a. FIVE FINGERS OF DEATH), THE ONE-ARMED SWORDSMAN, FIST OF LEGEND, MAD MONKEY KUNG FU, FIVE DEADLY VENOMS, and EIGHT DIAGRAM POLE FIGHTER in quality prints and not dubbed in dodgy English. Films like these have provided me a ridiculous amount of enjoyment over the years.

Mad Monkey Kung Fu (1979)

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MAD MONKEY KUNG FU (1979) Three stars
Been told I’ve been difficult to shop for when it comes to movies.

Yeah, I guess I can see that, but I don’t know, I believe that you should buy a truly unique product like MAD MONKEY KUNG FU and you can’t go wrong.

I broke in 2019 with this Shaw Brothers spectacular from 40 years ago, one which I bought a couple months back during a spree. Sometimes, titles alone just grip you in the supermarket, like Charles Bukowski’s NOTES OF A DIRTY OLD MAN, and you are compelled to put down the hardly earned immediately on that product. After the title, I saw the center MAD MONKEY KUNG FU cover image (double hooked) and then I found out that it was a Shaw Brothers production from their golden era (triple hooked). Nobody could change my mind or wallet.

I didn’t even need to see a plot summary to buy that sucker. I found this one on the Internet: “A martial artist seeks revenge on those who assaulted the elderly master who taught him a specialized form of kung fu.” Not sure about that one, especially the elderly part. I like this one better on IMDb, “A disgraced former Kung Fu expert makes a living as a merchant with the help of a hot headed friend. When the men are harassed by gangsters, the merchant decided to teach his friend monkey boxing so they can defend their business.” A smidge better plot summary, though a title like MAD MONKEY KUNG FU and a background in consuming martial arts entertainment can probably have you working out the plot in short time.

MAD MONKEY KUNG FU truly kicks into gear around the 49-minute mark and gives us an effective final hour that leaves us on a high note. Yeah, it’s not as great as other Shaw Brother spectaculars, like INFRA-MAN, THE 36TH CHAMBER OF SHAOLIN, and FIVE DEADLY VENOMS, because unlike those other films, MAD MONKEY KUNG FU drags in certain spots and needs, oh, what’s the phrase, where’s Archie Bell and his Drells when you need ’em, tightening up.

That final hour includes training sequences and faithful readers know that I am a sucker for training sequences. They are excellent in MAD MONKEY KUNG FU, and I wish they had started a lot sooner.

In 2015, Screen Rant’s Victoria Robertson ranked the 10 best training montages in movies and her list included 10) BATMAN BEGINS, 9) BLOODSPORT, 8) EDGE OF TOMORROW, 7) THE EMPIRE STRIKES BACK, 6) G.I. JANE, 5) MULAN, 4) ROCKY, 3) TEAM AMERICA: WORLD POLICE, 2) THE INCREDIBLES, and 1) THE KARATE KID. I suppose only American films were considered for the list, but I am suspicious of any training montage list that misses THE 36TH CHAMBER OF SHAOLIN and DRUNKEN MASTER.

Now, I would add MAD MONKEY KUNG FU to such a list.

All the spectacular acrobatics on display in MAD MONKEY KUNG FU brought on flashbacks of a recent mini-vacation to Branson and a two-hour show of the Acrobats of China on a Saturday afternoon.

I enjoyed both the Acrobats of China and MAD MONKEY KUNG FU for similar reasons, swept up in an old-fashioned story that’s old-fashioned for a very good reason but also captivated by the amazing physicality of the performers. Martial artists have that ability more than other action stars and I am dazzled by the three main performers in MAD MONKEY KUNG FU.

Chia-Liang Liu (1936-2013) serves as both the star and the director, and he was 42 around the time of the making of MAD MONKEY KUNG FU, definitely not elderly like it said in that one plot summary. Among his 26 directorial credits are some dynamite entertainments: THE 36TH CHAMBER OF SHAOLIN, RETURN TO THE 36TH CHAMBER, THE 8 DIAGRAM POLE FIGHTER, and DRUNKEN MASTER II. He’s obviously a name who you can trust when it comes to martial arts movies.

Hou Hsiao, the young disciple in the film, is most famous for MAD MONKEY KUNG FU and his physicality, including the ability to imitate a monkey, will stick with you arguably more than anything else in the movie. Reportedly, in a 2004 interview, Hsiao said that he doesn’t watch any of the 40-odd movies that he was in, except for MAD MONKEY KUNG FU. Hsiao worked as assistant stunt coordinator on the second 36TH CHAMBER film and the very, very entertaining CLAN OF THE WHITE LOTUS, and served as stunt coordinator for THE 8 DIAGRAM POLE FIGHTER.

Of course, we cannot leave behind Lo Lieh (1939-2002), the first kung fu superstar who became known predominantly for playing the heavy. For example, he’s the villain in THE 36TH CHAMBER OF SHAOLIN and CLAN OF THE WHITE LOTUS, as well as here. He’s great at it, and there’s just something about him that you love to hate and you want to see him served his revenge. A movie like MAD MONKEY KUNG FU needs an effective villain and Lieh fills that niche … so MAD MONKEY KUNG FU sewed up the critical roles of teacher, student, and villain.